EPIC FAIL!
Yes, I too am human (surprising I know!). My days are littered with mistakes, frustrations and failures, which is what makes the successes, however small, that much sweeter. A little preface: I attempted this cooking night shortly after the car accident and I was heavily medicated, perhaps explaining the proportion of disaster. I would love to have you try these dishes and let me know if it was in fact me in my drugged state that resulted in the inedible, or the recipes themselves. I do realize the irony of my last statement – it’s like saying “Ewww, this is so gross. Try it!” :)
Pork Paillards with Sour-Cream Paprika Sauce
Ingredients:
- 1 Pound Pork Tenderloin
- 2 Tablespoons Safflower or Grapeseed Oil
- ¼ Cup Dry, White Wine
- ½ Cup Chicken Stock
- 1/3 Cup Sour Cream
- ¼ Teaspoon Sweet or Smoked Paprika
Source: MarthaStewart.com
Preparation:
First cut the Pork Loin into 16 paillards. Trim any fat off the Loin and slice it on the bias into ¼ - ½ inch thick slices. Next take the Pork slices and flatten to ¼ - 1/8 inch thickness (I find it easiest to place the Pork between layers of plastic wrap and use the smooth side of a mallet to pound the heck out of ‘em). Next season each paillard on both sides with Salt and Pepper.
Now go ahead and heat the Oil (I used Safflower) in a large skillet over medium-high. Add 5 or 6 paillards to your pan and be careful not to overcrowd them. Saute them for 1 to 2 minutes per side until they turn that lovely golden-brown color. Once browned, transfer them to a plate and repeat until all Pork has been cooked.
Next, the best part, add the Wine and deglaze the pan by scraping up any left-over Pork tidbits with a wooden spoon. Continue cooking until the Wine reduces by ½ - about a minute. Add the Chicken Stock and any plate juices from the Pork. Reduce the pan heat to medium and simmer until the sauce reduces by ½ again, about 2 minutes.
For the finale, gradually add the Sour Cream and the Paprika (I chose Smoked). Be sure to taste test, some people prefer more Salt, Pepper, and Paprika – different strokes for different folks.
Personally, there was no amount of Salt, Pepper, or extra Paprika that could have saved this dish. Again, remember the disclaimer from above, but this was just AWFUL! I hate to waste food, but this was a necessary exception. I threw all the Pork and sauce in the trash. This is one of the reasons that Aquaman and I keep our Chinese food place on speed-dial. I suppose trying recipes you’re unfamiliar with is sorta like a crap shoot and this night I gambled it all and lost, royally. This recipe should feed 4, if yours turns out better than mine!
Baked Stuffed Potatoes with Roasted Garlic
Ingredients:
- 1 full head of Garlic, ½ inch cut off top
- 1 Tablespoon + 2 Teaspoons Extra Virgin Olive Oil, plus more for drizzling & brushing
- 1 ½ Pounds Baby Yukon Gold Potatoes (about 18), scrubbed clean
- 1/3 Cup Sour Cream
- 1 Teaspoon Fresh Thyme, finely chopped
- Coarse Salt and Pepper to taste
Source: MarthaStewart.com
Preparation:
First pre-heat your oven to 400 degrees. Take your head of Garlic and place it on a parchment-paper lined aluminum foil square large enough to totally encase the entire head. Season the Garlic with Salt and Pepper and generously drizzle with Oil. Wrap the Garlic tightly and roast in the oven until fragrant, about 1 hour.
Next prepare a large pot of salted water, add the Potatoes and cook until tender, about 20 minutes. Remove the Pot from heat and add the potatoes back to it and let them stand to cool for about 5 minutes.
Once cooled cut the rounded ends of each Potato (reserve ends for the filling), so that the Potatoes are able to stand on end. Now carefully, I said carefully, scoop out the inside of each Potato with a melon-baller and again reserve for the filling. Make sure to leave a thin layer on the bottom of the Potatoes so the filling doesn’t leak out.
Next peel the reserved ends and add them to a bowl with the scooped out insides. Stir in the Oil (1 Tablespoon & 2 Teaspoons), Sour Cream and Thyme. Squeeze the Garlic cloves from the skin and add to the mixture. Mash the ingredients until smooth and add Salt and Pepper to taste.
Prepare a baking sheet by brushing it with Oil. Fill each Potato skin with approximately 1 ¼ Teaspoons of the Potato mixture – they’ll be a little mounded on top. Place the Potatoes on the oiled baking sheet, about 1 inch apart and lightly drizzle with more Oil. Place them in the oven (still @ 400 degrees) and bake until golden – 25-30 minutes.
I blame the absence in my kitchen of a melon-baller for the failure of this dish. I thought, obviously erroneously, that a small spoon would work just as well, but even my smallest split every skin. The Potatoes are quite delicate and even though I tried very hard, it was to no avail. There was nothing truly wrong except the presentation, so I sucked it up and added the split Potatoes hulls to the Potato mixture and Voila – Mashed Potatoes. So not exactly as elegant or exciting, but still delicious. The Roasted Garlic infuses this dish with a wonderful, intense flavor that is mouth watering!
Honey-Glazed Onions
Ingredients:
- 2 Cups fresh or frozen Pearl Onions
- 2 Tablespoons Honey
- 2 Tablespoons White Wine Vinegar
- 1 Tablespoon fresh Basil or 1 Teaspoon dried Basil
- ¼ Teaspoon ground Sage
Source: Shine.com
Preparation:
If you’re using fresh Onions (which I did) place them in a medium saucepan with boiling water for 8 to 10 minutes until just tender; drain, let them cool slightly and then it’s easy to peel their skins. If using frozen Onions, follow the package directions to cook and drain.
In the same saucepan (less dishes, Yay!), combine the Honey, Vinegar, Basil and Sage. Add the drained Onions until they are completely coated in the glaze and heated through.
These were quite tasty; add to that simple to make and they required very few ingredients. Admittedly, they were the one redeeming factor of the entire night. Plus the added bonus, they were a great addition to the Chinese food we ordered!
